The Shepherd Boy and the Wolves (with one c*nt villager extra)

Once upon a time, in a land not-so-far away, there was a village situated on the outskirts of a forest. In the village, there lived a boy Ali, who was a shepherd (because he had a flock of sheep he had to take care of). Ali used to take the the herd of sheep across the fields near the forest where his sheep could have free food.

One day (read: Day 1), while Ali was peacefully sitting under a tree, watching over the herd, an evil villager (read: cunt) decided to have some fun in his own way. He suddenly started crying aloud “Watch out! WOLF! A WOLF! RUN! RUN FOR YOUR (pathetic) LIVES!!!!”. Ali quickly stood up, and tried to scare away the sheep, and started running to save himself. While running, he heard the villager ROFLing the fuck out of him, and Ali figured out that it was a prank (no cameras, tho). Ali seemed to be pissed, but instead of dealing with the villager, he decided to gather his sheep, and walk back to the village.

Day 2: Same Ali, with his same herd, and the same bullshit happened. This time, Ali was serious, because well, you know, he started hating the villager, and even cursed him. He cursed him, and he threw rocks at him. But the villager ran away, with a disgusting, paranoia-causing, wicked laughter on his ass-like face!

Finale: Same Ali, with his same herd, same place, same villager. But today, destiny HAAAADDD to be different. Neither Ali, nor the villager had ANY idea that shit was about to get real (like, Reeaall real). Villager had the same intention to make a prank, but Ali, being a victim of the prank two times already, had a different mindset. This time, Ali had decided not to fall for the prank…

Meanwhile, the wolves probably had a conference or something about the newly discovered mobile food resource (Yes, Ali’s herd of sheep). The wolves had been discussing about the vigilance level of the shepherd.

*insert lots of growls and howls* translated as:
Wolf 1: “Pack leader, we have had reports that the humans are rehearsing how to escape our ambush. We need to devise a solid strategy. They always have an eye on us, and they’ll sound an alarm when they see us”
Wolf 2: “They’ve been lately practicing aiming with rocks. The shepherd boy is a threat.”
Pack leader knew what was going on, as he had heard the stories from his ancestors, of a shepherd who lied to the villagers, but when his ancestors attacked, there was no one to protect the shepherd’s flock. The leader knew that how the humans have caused troubles for each other for centuries, and they find inner peace by teasing and bullying others. This was one of the trait of the humans that even evolution couldn’t deal with. Yes, the treachery, and wickedness.
Pack leader: “We’ll have no resistance. The human won’t run away. Trust me on this one. The alarm is useless”.

So, the wolves came out, and attacked. The villager, now in his wet pants started to scream him lungs out “WATCH OUT! THE WOLVES! THEY’VE COME FOR REAL”, and Ali, who didn’t even look at the other side, told the villager to (as I quote) “Fuck off! Not falling for this.”. But when the sheep started to make noise after a few seconds, Ali looked over, and found out that half of his flock was lying their in their blood, with wolves biting the flesh off their necks. The whole scene was so painful that Ali decided to run away without his sheep. And, now, he was left with nothing.

After-maths: The next evening, Ali went to the villager’s home, greeted him, and had his last words with him “Do you think it was a fucking joke?”, before he slit his throat and handed himself to the village police.

So, THAT, dear readers is how the World is right now. Bad guys have their fun at the expense of innocents losing their peace, property, family, and eventually their patience. And no matter how funny it seems to be at first, but eventually, the results will be negative for both sides (because Karma is real!). Honesty is probably one of the first steps if we want to have our desired World Peace*.

*Terms and Conditions apply.

A Modern Romance Story

Let’s just get out of the typical old-school ways of romance, let’s just stop running around in the valleys, let’s just stop stabbing trees for nothing, let’s just not start singing lullabies while driving @30 mph on a lonely road. It’s a new World (Illuminati alert). Come up with new (ironic) ways to express your love, just like this story…

Kevin (A typical adult douche) have been dying to find the love of his life. He wanted to feel this divine feeling, but he was losing his faith in “the search of true love” with every unmatched right-swipe on his newly installed Tinder app. “THREE goddamn days and I ain’t got even shit!”, he thought to himself. After all, what he was searching for was one of the biggest treasures a person could have. With every sleepless night passing by, the poor lad was losing his strength(s) (And he wasn’t even slightly ashamed of it).

On the other end, another typical adult douche, named Edmonia (good job, parents) found out that some “Kevin” (4.5 miles away) is interested in her. Edmonia, like everyone else, had issues with life (she was adopted, and her “parents” had told her this and she decided not to live with them anymore). A high-school dropout, who wanted to practice witchcraft, but ended up as a waitress because she couldn’t get her Hogwarts letter in the Sunday mail. For some real strange reason (most probably a failed summoning), she decided to spend rest of her life as an anti-social emo girl. But when she found out, that despite of her highly resisting outlook, some Kevin was interested in her (Btw, Kevin literally had right-swiped EVERY possible person he could find on Tinder, which includes a fake Vampire, Gothic twins, Pokemon fans, A Jesus’ cosplay, and a 58 YO trans from Thailand), she felt like gathering herself from the very scratch. For the first time in years, she had this really strange thought of putting on some makeup, and actually meeting someone with a positive vibe.

As soon as Kevin realized that he got matched, he instantly wanted to express his feelings. It was for the first time he regained his lost faith (and some strength) in true love, and he simply could NOT wait any longer to text “Yo, babe!”. After expressing his love to Edmonia, he waited for next 10 minutes, staring at the screen, before he got a “hey, let’s get crazy”. This! This was the moment when a whole new level of true love was born. It was different, it was new, it was unique, it was gross AF!

So it was decided. Both were destined to “meet and… eat”. 7 PM, some cafe of her choice. So, the big moment came. It was “almost” 7:20 PM, and Kevin was just ready to dress up for the said “big moment”. He just had his father’s looks in those red jeans, checked shirt, with his lucky Kansas City Royals’ baseball cap (which he probably picked up from the stadium 10 years ago after an angry fan threw it away after their 106th loss).

On the other side, Edmonia couldn’t find a proper dress for her special night. After giving a considerable thought, she made it sure that she wears THE most sluttiest thing in her wardrobe (Despite of being the author, I’m still no one to judge, btw). 7:40 PM, and now she was totally ready to leave for her not-so long awaited date.

Kevin, being a good (and desperate) guy, reached the place 5 minutes earlier than Edmonia. And when he saw her entering the cafe, he KNEW that she’s THE ONE! He had a good understanding of how his luck worked, and this always helped him in getting into the worst kind of trouble in life. He raised his hand, and after realizing that his gesture was totally ignored, he went up to her to accompany her to the table. Now that’s really gentlemanly.

“Hey, you’re finally here. I thought you were gone. I’m sorry for being late”, told Kevin. He was just being super-honest.
“No problem, dude! I kinda left, but then I had this feeling that I should go back”, Edmonia fully took the advantage of the situation.

(*Insert a lot of censored bullshit in here*)

Since now she had disclosed her little secrets to him, like how life had been, how her parents hid all those Hogwarts letter from her, and how desperately she was waiting for a white wizard to hand over some magical ring to her, Kevin knew instantly what she wanted in life. Yes! They both had the same wish, which was going to be fulfilled really soon. When she realized that finally, there was someone who could understand her, she had these big tears in her eyes. She tried to hold them back, pretending to look strong, but she eventually lost to her long held emotions.

Kevin wiped away her tears, and accidentally her eyebrows too (How the fuck does she cry, for the tears to be all up in her eyebrows?). He took her to his place, and both ended up in his wardrobe to continue “their journey towards Narnia”.

Things I do for love

-Courage the Cowardly Dog
-Jamie Lannister


P.S: Yes, I WAS probably on some serious drugs while writing this. Thank you!

“…somewhere right after where our jaws end”

First things first, if you’re going to read through all of this (please stop right here if you’re not in a good/happy mood), let me inform you that this will get pretty boring at some places. So, just in case you feel like you want to stop reading this, you have my permission to leave the page, or close the browser, or jump off a cliff, or do whatever you can to stop reading this. Secondly, there’s quite a chance that you might be a beautiful person reading this. (And btw, I don’t mind if you’re ugly, because you’re the reason rest of the World looks so beautiful. So, cheer up!)

This new mechanized World is something that NO ONE could’ve ever imagined 50 years back. Technology has made every possible effort to reduce the differences. The communities have come closer, people have the the power to share their thoughts literally thousands of miles away in a few clicks (just what I’m doing right now). You can have a lot of friends on Facebook, you can have a lot of followers on Twitter, you can always stay connected through Whatsapp. All in all, the distances have been reduced as little as an arm’s length. The World is so different from what it was about 50 years back (Tho I’m still not sure about that, because I’ve been here no longer than 22 years, and a few days).

But the real questions, Are we actually connected? Have the words not lost their true essence? Does being a “friend” means the same as it was 50 years back? Does “following” someone still has the same emotions as it had 50 years back? (Does playing with a “pussy (cat)” is the same thing it used to be back then?) How come these words have lost their true meanings? We can type a big “LOL” (notice the caps on), and we’ll still have that stiff, expressionless face of a dead person. All those emoticons mean nothing to us. We literally have at least ONE emoticon for EVERY imaginable emotion (Yes, there is one even for the expression when you can’t decide if you wan to be happy, or sad, or both, about something, and Whatsapp also offers you to choose the skin color if you’re offended by some kind of racism). We actually use them, all of them; smiling, laughing, crying, kissing, and God knows what else! But, do we actually laugh, or cry when we send them? We’ve forgot how to express out true emotions. We’ve forgot how to smile in a genuine way. Yes, we’ve become experts in putting on the masks, and can come up with the the most genuine looking, photogenic, mechanical smiles. The original smiles used to start with the heart (technically not), and ended up on the faces. These new smiles start somewhere right after where our jaws end, and hardly reach the faces (think of the most corrupt politician you know about, and imagine him/her smiling if you want to visualize what I’m trying to write in here).

I’m not saying that all this technology, all this interconnection, all this socializing is a bad thing, but as per the human nature (Especially talking about the millennials), all this seems to have backfired, and backfired really hard. And congratulations, if you’re still reading this. Reading this much of a thing requires a lot of patience, so, you definitely seem like a calm, and kind person (or probably you need to get a life). And *brofist* if you actually find the place(s) where I used “the the” in a sentence.

*signs-off, fades away*

P.S: Now I’ll randomly select ONE phrase from this post to be the title. If it felt like the post had no focus (which it actually didn’t have), that’s because I wrote it first, and THEN chose a topic for it.

Tear from her wrinkled eye

Evening’s knock on the door was the favorite delight for her ears, since the never ending day felt like eternities. Every moment without him would make her desire more and more of him.

Every tick on his workplace’s clock felt like a whip, as he was separated from the charm of his life. They both were like an ornament, incomplete without each other; meaningless without each other.

Both tired by the limitless wait of seeing each other, their one hug would be the remedy of every pain they had; pain of losing everything, pain of surviving on the horizon of the society. When you have spent a lot of time in agony, your heart becomes saturated with it. It’s a phase where no other suffering can hurt you, but only a blink of happiness creates a sparkle in your eyes, and you smile in the brightest way possible.

They only had each other, both of them were that blink of happiness for each other. They would smile at each other, they would dance in their small cottage, they would laugh together, they would sing for each other, and then they would cry together. The thought of all this going to end was so overwhelming, that no comfort in the World could quieten their melancholic hearts. Then they would mourn together, and they would comfort each other. This cycle of emotions would go on throughout night.

While she was trying to collect the scattered fragments of those beautiful memories, she realized that thirty years had been passed since she last heard the evening’s knock. She was losing those memories, and there was nothing she could do about it. She would subconsciously pray that no more memories may fall into the abyss of time. No matter how hard she tried to hold it back, eventually fell the tear from her wrinkled eye.

Women across the border

I was supposed to talk about the women on our side of the border, but I believe, that both the nations are like mirrors when it comes to the life of an Indo-Pakistani “Woman”. So, discussing your conditions would simply relate to ours as well, and vice-versa. There is a huge….really really huge difference between the status of a Woman shown on media, and her real status in the society. Those actresses, politicians, anchors, celebrities, wearing silk clothes, and desperately promoting themselves to become a symbol of high hopes….they do not even promote 0.1% of the Women of this region. What I believe is, that women in this region are like a candle, which is being burnt from both the ends. From one side, they are under the influence of male-dominance, and secondly, the society has adopted the mentality that a woman has no ability of stand up on her own feet. The reality is, that everyone is to be blamed equally for such condition of women.
I’ll highlight the the condition of the majority. Whenever a farmer commits suicide, it is her widowed wife who has to
spend her whole life in agony, fearing that how will her children raise without their father around them. Whenever a
soldier dies on border, it is a woman who loses a father, a brother, a son. I feel like I’m being forced to say things related to wars, killings, and violence. Maybe the reason is, that our nations had no peaceful history from their births. I wish, with the core of my heart, that one day, I may tell the World what real peace is, and use our friendship as the bright example.
We know that a Kashmiri shawl will look as good on an Indian woman, as the Rajistani Jewellery would look on a Pakistani woman. Every Indian woman would like to have clay pot that is “Made in Gujrat”, and every Pakistani woman wold love to wear that Banarasi Silk Saree. Every Indian woman would love to wear Hyderabadi bangles, and every Pakistani woman would be amused to to have Sanganeri bed-sheets on her bed. That’s what women are.

ISAAC NEWTON (1642–1727)


Newton was born in the village of Woolsthorpe, England. His father died before he was born and his mother raised him on the family farm. As a youth he showed little evidence of his later brilliance, except for an unusual talent with mechanical devices—he apparently built a working water clock and a toy flour mill powered by a mouse. In 1661 he entered Trinity College in Cambridge with a deficiency in geometry. Fortunately, Newton caught the eye of Isaac Barrow, a gifted mathematician and teacher. Under Barrow’s guidance Newton immersed himself in mathematics and science, but he graduated without any special distinction. Because the bubonic plague was spreading rapidly through London, Newton returned to his home in Woolsthorpe and stayed there during the years of 1665 and 1666. In those two momentous years the entire framework of modern science was miraculously created in Newton’s mind. He discovered calculus, recognized the underlying principles of planetary motion and gravity, and determined that “white” sunlight was composed of all colors, red to violet. For whatever reasons he kept his discoveries to himself. In 1667 he returned to Cambridge to obtain his Master’s degree and upon graduation became a teacher at Trinity. Then in 1669 Newton succeeded his teacher, Isaac Barrow, to the Lucasian chair of mathematics at Trinity, one of the most honored chairs of mathematics in the world.

Thereafter, brilliant discoveries flowed from Newton steadily. He formulated the law of gravitation and used it to explain the motion of the moon, the planets, and the tides; he formulated basic theories of light, thermodynamics, and hydrodynamics; and he devised and constructed the first modern reflecting telescope. Throughout his life Newton was hesitant to publish his major discoveries, revealing them only to a select circle of friends, perhaps because of a fear of criticism or controversy. In 1687, only after intense coaxing by the astronomer, Edmond Halley (discoverer of Halley’s comet), did Newton publish his masterpiece, Philosophiae Naturalis Principia Mathematica (The Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy). This work is generally considered to be the most important and influential scientific book ever written. In it Newton explained the workings of the solar system and formulated the basic laws of motion, which to this day are fundamental in engineering and physics. However, not even the pleas of his friends could convince Newton to publish his discovery of calculus. Only after Leibniz published his results did Newton relent and publish his own work on calculus. After twenty-five years as a professor, Newton suffered depression and a nervous breakdown. He gave up research in 1695 to accept a position as warden and later master of the London mint. During the twenty-five years that he worked at the mint, he did virtually no scientific or mathematical work. He was knighted in 1705 and on his death was buried in Westminster Abbey with all the honors his country could bestow. It is interesting to note that Newton was a learned theologian who viewed the primary value of his work to be its support of the existence of God. Throughout his life he worked passionately to date biblical events by relating them to astronomical phenomena. He was so consumed with this passion that he spent years searching the Book of Daniel for clues to the end of the world and the geography of hell. Newton described his brilliant accomplishments as follows:

I seem to have been only like a boy playing on the seashore and diverting myself in now and then finding a smoother pebble or prettier shell than ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me.

–CALCULUS: Early Transcendentals 9.E



The way it is not supposed to end

“The Mayans predicted an end to civilization but never described how that would transpose. Most people over the years assumed the Mayans meant a catastrophic event that would extinct mankind. But what if they thought of an end time that was far more frightening and destructive than that. Not the loss of mankind itself, but rather the loss of humanity. What if they meant a time where mankind would create wars for greed, would tolerate genocide. A time where people wouldn’t appreciate nature or even the earth, a time where faith, mosques, and churches become abandoned. A time where mankind would not cherish life. What if they meant a time where a person armed with a weapon would enter an area with women and children and murder them , one by one; for no apparent reason. What if the Mayans were right. What if this is how it all ends.” -Seph Lawless